Shaun of the Dead: Best Zombie Movie Ever

After a week of tsunamis, earthquakes, mudslides, Jon Gosselin, and David Letterman, its good to know that there is at least one school that thoroughly prepares for every possible disaster. There is still one school out there that takes the safety of it’s students very seriously. They believe in protecting them from hurricanes, and global disease, and zombies.Yes, zombies.

The emergency plan for the invasion of the Undead ( “flesh-eating, apparently life impaired individuals.”) Is not quite clear, what is clear is that in the event of an outbreak, there will be “documentation of lots of strange moaning.”

The not quite complete article is here

Wouldn’t you know it? This university is in Florida, the state which simultaneously has an incredible amount of elderly people and is being invaded by Burmese pythons. So I guess they know something about effective disaster prevention.

I don’t follow politics as much as I should, so when trying to wrap my head around it I often relate it to things I have a much better understanding of. Here’s my interpretation of Senator Arlen Spector’s defection from Republican to Democrat:

 It was quite a scene the other night as the Senate met for a sold out crowd at New York’s historic Madison Square Garden. Crowds from all sides held up signs some with jeers like; “McCain in the Ass” and “Biden’s Nuts!” but all in all it was a calm and everyone ready for a entertaining night of good ole fashion politicking.
 
Everyone was pumped for the night, but nobody was expecting the curveball Senator “The Spectacular” Arlen Spector had coming later that evening. During a Lumberjack Match between Harry Reid “My Fists” and Mitch “Machismo” McConnell, Spector interceded with a hand full of salt apparently blinding McConnell by accident.
 
After the match as Machismo verbally berated Spector in front of a sold out crowd slapping him across the face, then turned to walk away. As he did Spector became enraged and locked in his famous “Spectator” sleeper hold. As the rest of the G.O.P. attempted to stomp Spector off “Mad Man” Biden lowered from the rafters wearing his face war paint and proceeded to save Spector with the help of his Louisville Slugger.

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I’m staying at a friend’s place right now (thanks M! I’m going to pour through every magazine in your apartment), and she has some great Real Simple Magazines. I usually look to RealSimple for tips on how to use a colander 4 different ways or what colors will brighten up a cheaply-renovated kitchen.

This time I saw a devious little article on handwriting analysis. If you can’t get the July 2009 issue, have a little fun checking out their online article which analyzes famous criminal handwriting. I love it when goody-goody media does something nasty….If I happen to notice that any of my friends have similarly erratic “s’s” I’m going to be seriously concerned…I’m remembering a certain coworker who’s signature on Christmas Cards was a dagger-sharp left-slanted scrawl. (I miss you J!)

If you’re single and haven’t had any luck with online dating or friends playing matchmaker, then how about trying something entirely different like bartering for a mate?  That’s what 38-year-old, Kelly O’very, of Salt Lake City did when she placed a classified ad in KSL that read, “Free Jeep with wedding ring… Let’s get hitched!”  We don’t know yet if her barter idea will lead to good news, but I applaud Kelly on her guts and creativity.  For the full article, click on.

Wow, and I thought my luck was bad.

This story first came out Thursday and read something like this: Woman replaces her mother’s mattress, throws away the old one, later discovers that her mother had hidden $1million in it, runs to the nearest dump, and persuades them to let her search through garbage.

On Friday, the story had morphed slightly: turns out the woman knew about her mother’s lack of trust in banks, also knew that it contained less than $1million, but still hid a lot. She says her brain “simply blew a fuse.”

The only thing that remained the same: the money was never found.

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I was recently reading the book “Motherless Brooklyn” by Jonathan Lethem. It’s a great book that I highly recommend, but that’s not the point of this entry. During the course of the book some of the characters mention radio ads on during a Mets game for Garden State Brick Face and Stucco. This brought back a lot of memories to me.

As a kid I’d watch obscene amounts of TV and before we got wired for cable this meant watching a lot of WNYW and WPIX the two local independent stations (which later became Fox and WB/CW respectively). So on the joyous days I was home sick from school, or just had presidents day off I’d sit around in my Ghostbusters jammies and watch I Love Lucy reruns. During which they would always advertise Garden State Brick Face and Stucco. Reading those words elicited a warm feeling in me of more carefree times. [Read more →]

So everyone is concerned about swine flu and such, but I really think this a great opportunity to make Great Television people!When the inevitable zombie outbreak happens due to the swine flu I’m going to create and star in a new reality series for VH1 called “Apocalypse of Love”

I’m going to live in a specially fortified commune hidden deep in Alaska with 14 sexy ladies. These ladies will compete for permanent residency within the commune walls. These women will be from diverse backgrounds and all bring unique skills to the table. They will include; a doctor, farmer, athlete, mechanic, Mensa member, carpenter, painter/poet, solider and of course six drunken party girls. They will compete in numerous challenges like creating a melee weapon from household items, making pizza from scratch, fixing generators, and of course an obstacle course. [Read more →]

So those of you who know me may know I have a bit of a sweet tooth on occasion.
Not just that but in my workplace I’m a successful candy dispenser with the aid of my trusty Batman-head Halloween bucket.So because of this I get to see a lot of different candy out there.

I am always in the candy isle looking for deals and seeing what’s new. There have been some good new products out there but rarely am I actually excited about one when I see or hear about it. Yesterday I picked up a Thingamajig, which is the peanut butter sister to the Whatchamicallit.

(Thank You Casey for the use of the Camera)
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The recent announcement of both “Pride and Prejudice and Zombies” and a similarly veined “Pride and Predator” got me thinking…is this a launch of a new Genre - Victorian SciFi/Horror? It’s an odd combination I know, kind of Steampunkish but one that I can’t help but think will be great. It got me thinking what comes next?

Obviously Pride and Prejudice has been done to death so I decided to work on a treatment for another Jane Austen classic Sense and Sensibility.

Sense and Sizeability

After an accident kills Dr. Dashwood (a Mad Scientist) before he could create a will, he leaves the bulk of his estate to the son by his first marriage.

The same accident that killed Dr. Dashwood also injures two of his daughters. Elinor is doused with chemicals, which cause her to grow to over 10 feet tall, and when stressed she can grow to 20 feet tall and develop super strength. Marianne is left without sight, but her other senses have been affected and turned up to an almost super human ability. [Read more →]